IDEAS FOR ANNE'S PAPER: "A complete reconstruction of the paper is essential for the convincing of these testosteronical beasts of building (Dan language for construction workers) " --Dan Garvin
Describe the scene: This is the seller right here. You need the most eloquent placement of adjectives to make the scene of the old pipe odor drench the readers senses as he feels the stress that seems to wash over everything along with the dim, yellow, half burned out light. But we must keep it on a 6 grade reeding level. They are men. They build stuff. It is good. Dick and Jane reed the newspaper though, so you can use some higher reeding techniques into the mix. That's the hard part about it. But the key point is, ENTERTAIN THE READER! After the second sentence he has already decided if this is the house. He just needs to work out the details. So make the first paragraph gripping and enveloping.
Picking five specific points of the scene (ex: the sink) and describe them in a manner that is entertaining and unique. (the sink: An imported high quality particle board counter top supported by water rotted two by fours embrace a vintage pee yellow rust stained single basin sink.) Go with this as your first paragraph. Other points of interest are, the lighthouses (not very good interior design theme( no offense)), smoke stained walls and ceilings
Tell the Story: My mom went on a trip to London and Dad decided it was an opportune time to tear the kitchen apart and "fix the place"
Make the House Seem Like it can be Fixed: Yes, this is a key point. This part needs to be written in a more "to the point" mode. The testosterone based life forms are trying to make money. They need a house that has potential. The house needs to be a gem that can be showed off. If the house is just not worth fixing up, they really will not choose that one. They are looking for an old Victorian house that needs fixing up so that they can show it off to people and get more sales. You need to make your house sell to them. Make it sound like it could be beautiful!! Not just some rectangular, mediocre, lame, room that is torn apart. Yes it might be the ugliest one. I have no doubt about that. But can it be the best looking room after they are done? Or just a bit less mediocre?
Friday, September 19, 2008
Dan's thoughts on Katrina. (I mean the kitchen.)
Posted by LIS G at 10:21 PM
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6 comments:
Hahahhahahahahaaaaaa...Hahahaha..this is so great...ahhhh..I love this so much. The description of the sink, the lighthouses..The point you brought up is an important one tho. The rest of the house is horrible-ish and I can't imagine the tv shows that might care enough to help out wanting to spend time in the rest of the house! {: 0
the sink is my favorite... I love the descriptive writing!
I love it too, I cannot write like this... this is hard for me and that is why I called Laura and Lis to get some input... I will see what I can do
I'll see if Dan is interested in writing a paper too. i was listening to a show on this type of thing, they chose the family because they had a son with Leukemia and couldn't pay for updates on the house anymore.. do you think we could add something about 2 worn out parents that have gone through 16 children...?
Yeah, Laura actually thought we should mention 16 kids and how she had to take over 9 children because our mother died of cancer... I know that sounds horrible to use it but maybe that will help.
I LOVE this!!! I think we need to dredge up all the sadness and pain that will tug the heartstrings of millions, that's what will get the ratings... and will get the makeover. Add all the mentioned tragedy's and then tell about how she was cooking for her family when the kitchen caught on fire! Oh, after Mom dying, 9 motherless children and that might clinch it! Other trials???
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