Just the other day I was talking to Anne on the phone about husbands... sometimes they don't offer to help much around the house. Both Anne and I are trying hard to "Help" our sweet husbands want to help us. Well... I carried on this same conversation with Dan's mom. She told me it's impossible to try to get men to do what you want. I told her that I've been able to get Dan to make the bed by encouraging him... well, I guess by telling him how glad I am after he DOES it. So... I talked to Daniel about this. He said that he was busy alot.. with work and school 24/7, it's hard to do anything else but homework or relax when he can. Well... when we got home from school, walking through 12 inches of snow... we had a couple hours before we both needed to go back to work. Dan put on a classic smile, and trudged through the house with his soaked shoes... then went straight to the bathroom, (I followed bugging him the whole way) he started going while I was standing there... then, he didn't flush while leaving the toilet seat up. To my surprise he started to leave the bathroom without washing his hands. Dan never does any of this... He is very ordered and clean... I finally understood what he was doing. Daniel... so cunning, was trying to show me that he is good, and does alot of things that I don't already notice. He does try to keep the house looking nice, and keeps the toilet flushed with lid down... he made me laugh when he was finished with his act. The crazy things he does sometimes.. This doesn't mean I won't keep trying! I have to remind him that he has magic drawers, maybe he'll do the laundry next week.. who knows?
P.s. my project at school changed to Cochlear implants. If you want to comment on this as well... Here's the background information on this:
Children are tested in the first few weeks after birth for hearing disabilities. If they are deaf, or hard of hearing they have the option of a hearing aid, or cochlear implant. The battling question is whether or not to place hearing aids on the child. Much of the deaf world feels that being deaf is a part of who they are. They take great pride in being deaf. The choice to put hearing aids must be done early, within the first month of life... when the branching of neurons in the brain takes place. (This also helps the child to learn with the aids rather than without them early, then trying to implement them later). SO the question is: Put hearing aids on, or leave them behind and allow the child to be Deaf, and join the deaf culture?
Monday, February 4, 2008
Daniel's humor again...
Posted by LIS G at 6:39 PM
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10 comments:
again my comments with no base except opinion but I don't even think it is an question if the child has hearing parents and a family who is not part of the deaf culture you get the implant. Now if the child has family who are deaf than I would still go for the hearing aids and implant but I can see where it would be more of a question, but you can always teach your child sign language whether they are hearing or not you can not teach a deaf child how to hear
Everything Janelle said. Me too.
As for Dan, hahaha..very funny. My husband is a huge helper, cleans more than me sometimes so I don't really have much to add. All of his brother's are just like that too so Im surrounded by his family here and we're all very blessed to have extremely helpful husbands. I do know tho, especially with our silly Dad who would go out and clean the entire garage when his wife was freaking out about getting the HOUSE cleaned for guests- that many men DO exactly what you were talking about but they also do so many other wonderful things that we don't recognize because we are so busy noticing all the things we want them to do..good post miss Lisbedef.
Ha ha on the husband part! That is something that would happen hear too, where we also have magic dressers!! My whole family loves them.... but mine must be broken.. cause I am the only one that doesn't see the "magic" behind it all?....
On the implants. I think I would choose to put them in. One of my standing mottos as a parent is to not make choices for them when they should be able to make the choice themselves. As in, getting my child's ears pierced, I wanted them to understand it before I had it done, it's their body. But, the reverse is also true. All a parent can do is make the best decision for the child that is too young to know yet. Not that an implant is "the best" choice for every one, but, if you have the opportunity, and the best time to do it is when the child is young, you've got to just have it done. If they choose not to use it.. that's on them later.
Also, I think the culture in the deaf community will change with time... I believe that as more and more children (or children's parents) opt for the implant, it will be more acceptable and seen as the main stream. It's sad to me, that the opportunity to hear even a little, would be missed based on that.
I like Janelle's comment, that you can't teach a deaf child to hear...I think the implant is a great option. Although, I really wish technology would come forward so they aren't so obvious, that can't help the cause at all.... as a child, that would have made me feel like an outsider for having one. What a debate....
Go Dan!!! That is a perfect way to show what men do... most of what men do is in the background...little things here and there...we usually don't care if you even know what we are doing..until you start thinking your the only one doing anything.
It is a simple concept of women need to be appreciated...men like to be left alone (at least till THEY want you around) look at the parents...HELLO!!
Now with time, communication and some changes on both sides...this merges to that 'one-ness' we all seek. For some of us its only a few months or years...others...well...sooooooooo muuuuuuccchhhhhh loooooonnnggggeerrrr!!!
The second issue here is men put a HUGE priority on relaxing...some call it lazy...but this is how we disassemble stressful situations. Some of the 'work' we do around the house...is actually our form of relaxing. It really depends on the day I guess.
Regarding the implants...I feel that hearing is such a blessing that if the choice is available to give a child the possibility of hearing it is well worth it. Either way they are probably going to 'join' the deaf community to some extent. I am not interested in joining normal society...more along the lines of the ability to hear ocean waves crashing against the shore...wind whispering in the trees...birds chirping in the morning...car brakes screeching right before your life is taken...hee couldn't resist..
thanks everyone for your comments... I wish I could show you the Deaf worlds point of view on implants... you would be shocked!!
By the way.. Jon your comment really helped me feel better. I stress too much as Daniel knows.. I need to relax... as I now think of it.. I relax by cleaning. Dan doesn't have to relax the same way I do. I really didn't notice how much he does.. now I need to start doing that. Thanks for the other comments too. Magic drawers.. and Becca your sooooo lucky!!
From my schooling a large part of the deaf community sees coclear implants as a frankensteinian attack on a perfectly fine child. But, if the child is not anywhere near the deaf community, shouldn't he be allowed to participate in the community his family lives in? It is hard. Deaf people have actually said, "Well if you are going to ruin a deaf child, maybe I should deafen my hearing child." No lie, I don't think they mean it, they just are trying to get across the point, they are not broken, don't try to fix them. If hearing parents of deaf children would truly learn sign and insist on interpreters and language training in the child's schools, it wouldn't be so difficult.
It is a tough debate. Has hearing people...we would loathe to lose that ability. So we would naturally feel that we should give our children the same benefit.
Interesting that deaf people see it the opposite. I would have thought they would want to hear...not really because they wanted to be like others...but just because it is a wonderful experience to close your eyes...and just listen. I am pretty sure that some 'hearing' person has signed to a deaf person what this is like...(or at least attempted)..hmmm...interesting subject.
So, I brought the husband subject up when we were visiting Nate's family this weekend, and it was just funny to see how this idea of men wanting to relax and women... well wanting to relax but not being able to till the chores are done is very prevalent. I always loved that Nate would use the excuse that he was tired from working and going to school, especially when I was working and going to school too while trying to also keep the house up. We decided that it's just the differences in the way men and women think- women at work and school will think in circles, thinking about the task on hand, errands that need to be run, chores that need to be done, what to make for dinner, etc; over and over again, whereas guys at work or school will think about work or school till they are done, then will switch to the next task. Thinking about other things just isn't something they naturally do. Anyways, it was just funny to see, esp cause Nate's mom has been working all week, and her husband has been on vacation and then sick leave for the past two weeks... at home. And what does he do all day? Relax. yup. kinda annoys her right now cause he still expects her to keep up the house and make dinner, even though he's home all day and can do it perfectly well himself.
Incidentally, that brings me to another point about how girls and guys are different. Girls think differently about making dinner than guys. Girls have a bit of a process they go through- go through the fridge and cupboards, then decide what we could make with what we have, before settling on what to make and making it. Guys... well, they open the cupboard and typically make mac and cheese.... The process isn't as intensive for them, again because they don't think so much about how they can use various ingredients to make a healthy meal, but rather about what they can make quick. ANyways, yeah, it was a fun conversation.
I got this in an email from tammy today, and I thought of your blog post with all the women vs. men...
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of GQ.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
WOMEN'S REVENGE
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished
to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a
television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and
I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto
your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a
spider.
MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and
his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and
dislikes.'
He addressed the man, 'Can you name your wife's favorite flower?'
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, 'It's
Pillsbury, isn't it?
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball
of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons
for your wife?
He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the
store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of
tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much
cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she. (I figure
this guy is the one on the milk carton!)
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'
WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be so stupid
and so beautiful all at the same time. 'The wife responded, 'Allow me to
explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made
me stupid so I would be attracted to you !
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the
next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:0 0 AM for an early
morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the
silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at
5:00 AM ' He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning,
the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his
flight Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened
him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is
5:00 AM . Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft
before the masterpiece
I love the new layout and picture of your beautiful face!!
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